You Talkin' to Me???

Here’s a tip: If I’m walking around outside in the middle of a work day, chances are I'm not going to want to take five minutes of my free time to talk to a total stranger. A surprising number of people have failed to recognize this lately. It used to be that the only time I had to put on my “preoccupied, looking down at the sidewalk, fixing my sweater" act was for the homeless man hanging around outside the newsstand next to my office. I mastered the art of ignoring his pleas for spare change (hey - I donate to the capital area food bank. And besides, I don't want to set a precedent and have him badgering me that much more next time). But lately, it’s a minefield of solicitors. Some are friends of Mr. Homeless Man; others are college students for various political platforms complete with matching clipboards. The other day I stood at a crosswalk stumped over selecting the least invasive route back to the office. Would it be passing the fourth Greenpeace hawker of the day asking me if I wanted to save the environment? Or face Mr. Homeless Man and friends, one of whom is especially good with laying on the “God Bless You” guilt trip when you ignore him? I can’t remember which way I chose, but I do recall racing back to the “safe haven” of the office (how sad is that?).

Another time, I was walking by a gentleman selling “Street Sense.” “Street Sense” is a newspaper whose profits go to benefit homeless people, and the articles are written by the homeless. What was interesting about this instance was that I was thinking about purchasing a “Street Sense” as I approached the guy, but I didn’t have any small bills. This didn’t stop the “Street Sense” man from soliciting me, and when I politely declined, he brazenly inquired, “May I ask why?” What am I supposed to say, “Because I only have big bills?” "Because the homeless have poor grammar?" I still might buy “Street Sense” someday, but you can bet it won’t be from him.

What really killed me, though, was my experience today. As is often the case after 2:00, I was feeling a little afternoon fatigue. So, despite the fact that it was raining outside, I decided to give myself a jolt with a latte from my favorite coffee shop across the street. As I hurried my way to Sip of Seattle in my silk skirt and white top with a very cheap umbrella, I saw some girls with clipboards huddling under the Payless Shoes awning. I was absolutely dumbfounded when one of them stopped to ask me if I had “time for human rights.” Usually, I say something like “not right now,” or “maybe next time.” This time, it was a snippy “Nope!” I mean, are you joking??? It’s POURING rain. Let me run to my coffee in peace! Come to think of it, Greenpeace is kind of a misnomer, huh? Because I certainly don’t feel peace when I see them on the sidewalk.