Asians in the 80s

It's Asian Heritage Month, according to my Human Resources (although a search of it online brings up a lot of different months for 'Asian Awareness'), and after killing some time in front of the TV last night, watching some VH-1 Classic, I was thinking about Asian video vamps that came out in the 80s.

My definition of a video vamp is the female 'object of desire' in a music video - think Jessica Hahn in Sam Kinnison's 'Wild Thing' or any of those girls that those NKOTB boys were chasing around the graveyard for 'The Right Stuff.'

Anyways - I caught John Waite's video, 'Missing You' and never realized that the girl that he's obsessing about, in the video, is Asian. Or at least she looks like she's got some Asian blood in her. Add that to the only other two token Asian females I can remember from that time period that lit up the music video world - the Asian woman with the long nails and the 'piggish' nose in David Bowie's, 'China Girl' and of course, who can forget the Asian lady strutting her stuff and letting George Michael (presumably 'straight' or 'confused' at this time) write 'Monogamy' on her thigh in 'I Want Your Sex?' (Or did he write polygamy? After all, sex is best when it's one on one...according to the song.)

What happened to those girls? Where are they now? I could've sworn that I read, not too long ago (maybe in the last 2-3 years) that the woman in the David Bowie video was dating him at the time but now she's living in Europe somewhere - living a very, nice life.
As for Georgie's lady? Couldn't tell you. Do I care to do the research to look her up? Probably not.

Other than these videos, you didn't really see a lot of Asians in the 80s - and if you did, it was the stereotypical nerd-type Asians in movies...which is kind of a shame since we're not all like that. Shout out to Data, Long Duk-Dong and Takashi!

Happy Asian Heritage Month.

Beware of Mean Streets

Let this serve as a 'traveler's warning' if you plan on being in New York City's Chinatown...those are some mean streets...and I'm just referring to day time!

I grew up going to NYC's Chinatown frequently. I think we used to go once a month, if not every other month. So after doing that for many, many years with my family, by the time I was able to drive, I knew how to drive myself into the city, park at the now 'off-limits' Police Plaza, and walk into Chinatown to do what I had to do.

Never had a problem walking around Chinatown. It isn't the type of place where we would go to spend the day eating, shopping, mingling with the locals...no. It was the type of place where we would go, get our hair cuts, have some lunch, buy some groceries and make it home in time for dinner. I still pretty much follow the same routine today. I don't think I have ever stayed long enough to have two meals in Chinatown. Not that I'm not willing - but when you're in New York City, there is PLENTY of other stuff you want to be doing.

Flash forward to present day when I now go into Chinatown with my sister and usually a child. The child we decided to go into Chinatown with for this latest trip is four. He is still too small to be doing all that walking to and from the PATH station but too big to carry around if he were to get tired so that required us to bring in a stroller. Here's your warning - Chinatown is NOT stroller friendly. The sidewalks are often packed with locals and tourists ... and you have a lot of traffic just on the sidewalks alone. The locals, usually elderly, walk REALLY slow and the tourists like to walk and just stop in their tracks to look at what's around them. What happens to the person with the stroller? We are forced to stop short and block pedestrian traffic behind us because people are too ignorant to move off to the side. There were instances where I just took to the streets and pushed my nephew there because there was less traffic.

The stroller unfriendly areas aren't just on the outside (streets and sidewalks) - much like other Asian and European cities, if you walk into a restaurant, everything is so narrow inside that you're forced to leave your stroller in a corner, pray to God that someone doesn't walk off with it, and have your meal. Going into a store is much the same - where I first have to get the stroller into the store (usually up 1-2 steps) and then roll it straight into a store....if I don't see anything I want in the store, I usually have to do a K-turn with the stroller to get out of there.

People really don't care that you have a stroller and a small child that you're trying to transport. The streets are so unkempt that I had a cup of milk-tea in the cupholder of the stroller and half of it splashed out of the 'to-go' cup and onto the stroller because the sidewalks were so bumpy. No one moves out of your way - hey, they have their own agendas. BUT they will stop to tell you that the kid's feet, in the stroller, is dragging along the sidewalk. I can't tell you how many people told me that and it's like, 'I know! He's too big for this stroller but he's sleeping so leave me alone!' And it's not like they're telling me - they're pointing or yelling at me in Cantonese (which is not Chinese dialect of choice) so I yell back in English.

What did I learn from this latest romp into Chinatown? I'm no longer going into the city with a stroller. I am okay with going with kids but they will be walking. Although I had a great time in the city with my sister and nephew, I feel like I need another trip to do my leisurely shopping in the jewelry stores...sans stroller.

Taking it Personally

One characteristic you will never hear used to describe me is "tough skinned." It's just not me. Sure, I try to be laid back. And I am sometimes - about some things. I have fun with life, and I try to see the humor in a bad situation (if you look closely, there is a lot of it). I am self deprecating. But I also take some things personally.

That's not to say "taking it personally" is always the wrong reaction. When my husband and I debate about things, he sometimes throws that "don't take it so personally" argument my way. This will annoy me because what we're talking about is a personal matter. So of course I will take it personally.

But I take it personally where I shouldn't too. Case in point: the sale of our townhouse. My realtor set up this nifty survey that he would send out to each of the showing agents. Sometimes they responded, sometimes they didn't. But I will tell you one thing: I was always disappointed. My favorites were the first two questions, "Did your client like the property? Answer: no;" "Is your client considering a second showing? Answer: no." Makes you feel great, no? No. It made me feel like all of that time I spent remodeling my kitchen, my master bath, installing hardwood floors, and buying new carpet weeks before it went on the market were all for NOTHING!! Never mind that I bought state of the art stainless steel appliances and created a kitchen that is 100 times better than what was there when I moved in, my house was "average." I took this as a reflection on me.

Well, we finally got an offer on the place, and it looks like we are on our way. And that's all great, and I am happy. Not as much as I wanted, but hey - I still come out ahead. But you know what my favorite part of the whole deal was? The buyer wanted me to leave the wall vases in the dining room - vases I picked and installed myself.

She likes my house, she really likes it!!

A Poor Lost Soul

When I know I'm heading up to New Jersey or New York, I like to time my next manicure/pedicure to coincide with the trip. Sure, I have a regular joint that I get my nails done in Virginia, but if I get a chance to be in New Jersey or New York City -there is a nail salon in each place that I love going to...the Nail Club...Spa II in West Caldwell and Rehoboth Nails off 14th Street, near Washington Square. For the same price as a manicure and pedicure in Virginia, I get so much more out of the two places in New York and New Jersey - namely, a sea salt scrub, callus treatment and a hot stone massage. It's heavenly!

On my most recent trip to the Nail Club, I was thoroughly enjoying my pedicure treatment - with the sea salt leg scrub and the hot stone massage....I could've sat in that massage chair for the rest of the day! After the pedicure was complete, I headed over to a manicure booth so that she could shape and treat my finger nails. While sitting at the booth, two other patrons, an elderly mother and her middle-aged daughter, came in to get their nails done. The elderly mother went first and sat in the booth next to me. In the process of being seated, the daughter explained that her mother just wanted a basic manicure and that she wanted something sheer pink. The daughter ended up picking out the color and all was good. As the mother was getting her nails done, she asked the Korean nail technician, 'Is my husband going to pick me up?' This is when warning bells started going off in my head. The nail technician wasn't the best in English language and I didn't know what to say, but her daughter, sitting in the nearby waiting area, said, 'Ma - I'm taking you home...you're coming back to my house.' And that seemed to satisfy her mother.

When the mother is finished (I feel kind of bad because she got totally jipped out of a sea salt scrub for her hands), she gets put in the nearby drying area to let her nails dry. Her daughter takes the seat next to me now and I compliment her purse - it is a nice purse but that's about all the small talk I was making. As the daughter and I were getting our nails done simultaneously, you heard another peep out of her mother at the drying station, 'Does my husband know to come here to pick me up?'
Her daughter swiveled around to face her mother and said, 'Ma - Dad is home with Jim. They're all back at my house.'
'Then how am I going to get home,' Ma asked.
And the daughter replied, 'Through me, Ma. I'm going to take you home,'
This satisfied Ma.

Finally I'm finished and I get sent over to the drying station. I sit down next to Ma as I patiently wait for my fingers and toes to dry. I'm drying for about two minutes when Ma turns to me and says, 'I hope my husband knows to come and pick me up.'
I said, 'I think you'll be fine. You'll be going home with your daughter.'
'And she's sitting right there - on the other side,' she asked.
'Yes - she's there. Don't worry,' I said.
Since the chairs in the nail booths are really like executive swivel chairs with high backs, she couldn't see her daughter.
Another minute goes by and Ma says, 'People must think I'm crazy - but I'm not. I'm just in an unfamiliar place. And I don't know how I'm getting home.'
That's when her daughter swiveled back around and said, 'Ma - you're with me - I'm going to bring you home. Okay? Don't worry.'
I smiled back at Ma - hoping she was reassured and at the same time, pitying her for what looked like the beginnings of senility.

I was really in a rush because I was going to go surprise my nephew and pick him up at school - so I only had a few minutes before I needed to leave. But I also felt like I should stay with Ma to make sure she was okay. Ma did thank me for talking to her and reassuring her of everything - she said that not many people would but it was very nice that I did.

Okay - so maybe Ma's not so senile.

A Tale of Two Shirts

This past weekend, my husband Shawn and I went to the FedEx Kinkos Classic tournament in Austin. It was a real treat for him - my friend Jenn's parents got us the tickets, including entry into the VIP lounge on the 16th hole. Not too shabby. According to Jenn, her dad is basically the mayor of Lakeway, or at least it seems that way based on his popularity among the retired set. Shawn happily tagged along with Jenn's dad all day to watch numerous holes. During this adventure, he confirmed that, in fact, everyone knows Jenn's dad.

While Shawn and Jenn's dad were out gallivanting, Jenn and I decided to hit the gift shop. I wanted to buy Shawn a souvie for his birthday (today!!). Jenn thought she would buy a shirt too for her boyfriend. She decided against it when she saw the hefty price tag. But then the sales clerk revealed a special deal: buy a shirt on a hanger and get a folded pique shirt for only $10. What a bargain!! I had already selected one of the hanging shirts (a pretty blue number), so I told Jenn that she could pick out a $10 shirt for her boyfriend. We spent a long time debating the color. Would it be orange, or green, or yellow? (her boyfriend is drawn to bright hues). After the debate, we finally selected blue. The salesclerk bagged them for me, and we headed back to our home base: the VIP lounge.

While we spent a great deal of the day going our separate ways, at one point, all five of us (Jenn, Jenn's mom and dad, and Shawn and me) managed to be in the same place at the same time at the 16th hole. We sat and watched the current foursome tee off, and Shawn revealed to me that one of his favorites was in this foursome: one Ben Crenshaw.

Well, soon Shawn and Jenn's dad were on their merry way again, and Jenn and I walked around some more with Jenn's mom. We walked past the 16th hole and along the 17th. Finally, we got to the 18th hole, where a foursome was just finishing up. As they walked off the hole, people were lined up getting autographs. And this is where we realized - this was Ben Crenshaw's foursome!! Well, I knew what I had to do - I had to get that autograph! Only problem was that I had nothing good to sign. A lot of people had hats and gloves and balls. I had none of these. I really thought about going back to the shop and picking up a hat, but alas, I just didn't think I had the time. I started to panic. I couldn't miss out on this grand opportunity. So I decided it had to be done: I had to have Ben sign the shirt I bought. I pulled it out of the bag, and I positioned it on a program for easy signing. And sure enough, Ben came through and signed my shirt. I even got extra interaction with him because I had to pull the shirt taut while he signed. I was so thrilled with myself. It was the perfect gift!!

It was only when I walked away from the line with a big old grin on my face that I looked at the tag: XL. For some reason, I thought I had bought Shawn a Large.

"Yeah, I wondered about that," said Jenn. "That was Tom's shirt."

Whoops! Not anymore!

Invasion of the M.I.L.!!!!!

Mother's Day is around the corner and I'm about to face every daughter-in-law's worst nightmare....the invasion of my MOTHER-IN-LAW!!!! Okay, maybe it's not every daughter-in-law's worst nightmare....but it sure can be darn awkward!

This will be my MIL's (we'll just shorten it to that) first visit to see us...ever. She doesn't travel well (hmmm, wonder where my husband gets it from) and she is pretty high maintenance when it comes to needing things prepared for her. I have visions of her getting rolled out in a wheelchair by a skycap cause she's too lazy and confused to walk to the baggage claim area. I've already got a grocery list (on top of my own) of things I need to get for her during her stay. My husband was reading me her list and it included a 12-pack of Cherry Coke Zero and two 2-liter bottles of Diet Ginger Ale. I was thinking, 'Doesn't she know she's only staying for five days?' It would take me more than a month to finish all that. Apparently, this is her 'water' so I was assured it would all be consumed.

Since this is my MIL's first visit to see us - possibly the first visit ever to the nation's capitol, I have been having my husband grill her on what she wants to do when she's here. She wants to see the monuments. My response to that is, 'Well that's great but she does realize it's a lot of walking?!' My MIL has some health issues - they include, and are not limited to, sore legs, being overweight, constipation, and tiring easily. She has always said that she needs to lose weight - and a couple of times, in my 10+ years of knowing her, she has joined the gym only to quit because it was starting to bother her legs and back. So I wonder if she realizes that the monuments are not all jam-packed into one city block and that to actually see the monuments, you have to walk to the monuments - and it's a good 3-4 hour walk, total. I guess we'll find out. Maybe she'll just ask us to drive by the monuments - that might be easier on all of us.

My MIL is a very nice woman - don't get me wrong. She has just gone through some hard times in her life, including a liver (or kidney) transplant - and I think a lot of it has impacted the way that she lives today. I can understand her hardships and I do greatly admire her for raising a child, on her own, after divorcing her husband when my husband was two years old.

But there are times that I honestly want to wring her neck - those are times when she needs to draw attention to herself when other people are having a conversation (not about her) around her and when she spends money she doesn't have on things she doesn't need. This last statement is a weakness for a lot of women, myself included...shopping...but I have the money to pay for my purchases....she does not.

So this is her Mother's Day and Birthday gift....a flight out to see us in our new home, in VA. She is staying for five days and six nights. I worry about the foods that I should make for her....she doesn't eat seafood or shellfish (which is like my main culinary menu) and she doesn't eat a lot of ethnic or spicy. So I guess it's going to be meat and potatoes for us.

And guess what...my husband is just as enthusiastic about her visit....

Wish us luck!

Fakin' It

A successful trip to New York City this past weekend - got my hair cut - it's got shape and is significantly lighter in weight - Donnie knew just what to do (like I knew he would) - and this visit's topic of conversation (when he wasn't humming along to Rod Stewart): Asians with their fake hair color.

I actually brought up the topic because I was looking over some of the hair cut books that they have in this salon. They have all kinds - some that I remember looking at 15 years ago - but now they have newer ones that have all Asian women in it - and guess what...all the Asian women have like red/orange hair. I don't need to tell you how natural that all looks - NOT! So when I was looking over the book while sitting in Donnie's chair, I asked him, 'How often do these girls need to get their hair dyed to look like this?' He laughed and was like 'Well, since this is their career, probably pretty often because the roots are eventually going to come out.' It is just so ridiculous to me - to go through all that maintenance for something that looks so obviously fake.

I admit that back in my college days, I tried some hair color on my head - but it was like temporary stuff and it was streaks - not the whole darn thing. After a good yelling by my parents, I stopped doing it...and haven't put hair color in my hair since...but I do pluck out any grays (which Donnie says is cheating). So then I got Donnie in this tirade about how those girls look so fake - I totally agreed - and how he's seen Asian people try to pull off blonde and how it looks so horrible because not only do they look ridiculous, but they all manage to (and we said this at the same time) "forget to color their eye brows." If they do color their brows, am I supposed to think you're an Asian albino? I don't get it.

Meanwhile, while we're going off about these fakers, Dorothy, another hairdresser in a booth behind Donnie, has fake blonde/orange hair - and it's been that way since I've been going to the salon - so 20 years - she's a little old Asian lady and she has blonde/orange hair...I actually think she might have stripped her hair of any color and constantly dyes it to make it look consistent. I guess when you work in that environment, you have constant access to the supplies so it wouldn't be hard to keep up.

And let's not forget those Asian ladies at the hair cart in the mall - with the fake hair and bejeweled hair accessories - having blond hair extensions in your black hair isn't exactly going to win me over in being a customer....and piled on top of all the colors of hair you have? Hey - how about just make it look real...let's see what it looks like then.

This also brings me to my new thing, all in the same vein of 'fakin' it.' My fake tan. I don't go to any tanning parlors and I sure do not take advantage of the tanning beds at the gym (who knows how sanitary those things are) -but I decided to try self-tanning lotion (by Neutrogena). I did it for a couple of reasons. I wanted to gets some color without going into the sun. Also, my legs were very blotchy due to some bruises that I've received playing sports. I figured if I self-tan them, it won't look so discolored and so far, I've gotten pretty nice results. My worst fear, before starting this whole thing, was that I would miss a spot and I would have random hand prints on my legs where you can see I was rubbing the lotion in. Now, my worst fear was that when getting a pedicure over the weekend, and the woman was rubbing sea-salt scrub on my legs, she would rub off the fake tan and I would be leaving there with half white/half brown legs! It didn't rub off.

I get the idea that self-tanning is also used to do away with tan lines - but for some reason, I still keep my panties on when rubbing the lotion on my legs. So far - no big mishaps. I have to have my husband rub it on my back and make sure I get the back of my arms and hard to reach places - but I like it so far. I'm trying not to overdo it because I'm not exactly doing my legs and the rest of my body on the same schedule - my legs have already received three applications where the rest of my has only received one - Since everything seems to be looking okay -I'll have to catch my body up with my legs.