Amanda & Jen - a Retrospective

My friend is moving...pretty far away. Not California far, but southern border Texas town far - I will call it 'Texico.' Any which way, it's far enough. We all knew she'd be moving in the spring and we all knew that the time was drawing nearer - but the time is practically here - she's leaving next week. The friend is Amanda - the other half of Morning Cupcake!

It hasn't hit me yet - I may still be in denial. But all the months leading up to the inevitable departure has made me think about all the good things that have happened since becoming friends with Amanda:

My wardrobe has seen a big increase in the shoe and dress/skirt department since befriending Amanda. When first hanging out with Amanda, rarely did I ever see this girl in anything but a skirt and heels (platforms for the summer). So as we became closer friends and bonded over shopping trips, my closet began seeing more skirts/dresses and heels. I even broadened my black shoe horizon by purchasing grey shoes and red shoes - and those have become favorites in the closet. When I hit store websites, the first thing that I go to are 'dresses' and 'skirts.' I don't know why...I definitely have enough...and I think there is an imbalance of bottoms to tops. But my work wardrobe has certainly seen a positive change/increase and I owe most of it to Amanda. Without her equally fabulous fashion sense and enabling techniques, I would still be stuck in blah-collared shirts and flat shoes.

But Amanda and I weren't just about shopping - no way. It was about so much more. We found that we shared so many common interests - a love of music, movies, hot actors, good TV, the arts, dancing and everyday ridiculousness. We took karaoke to a whole new level by making it to the Karaoke Revolution finals, during ski trip, only to score perfect 50,000s on raw throats and a dying audience. And then repeating it the following year. We ventured to the Rock-It Grill, in Old Town, and had our fun, smoky, dance-party karaoke times in there. While driving in the car, how many people can you find that actually know the lyrics to Air Supply and will endure pain due to all the emotional hand movements that go into singing 'All Cried Out' and 'Total Eclipse of the Heart'? (Not many, I bet.)

One of my best memories is playing golf with Amanda for the first time (our first time playing together, not out on the course) on a hot, sweltering August day - who else could I depend on to join in my overheated fun than Amanda? I busted out the 'Beat It' dance (I even got some claps from a passing golfer), she made fun of me driving with a 'hammie' (sandwich) in my hand, we did circus tricks from our golf cart when picking up our stray balls (all while singing circus music) and we were together in arms against the golf nazi.

We signed up for hip-hop dance class together and were super ecstatic when we got chosen to move on up from Hip Hop I to Hip Hop II in a few short weeks! I will miss our routine trips to the 7-11 after class to get our much-deserved Slurpees (and then running back to our cars because of the shady people that hang out there). Never in a million years did I think I would be having a recital at the age of 32. And of course, would you expect anything less than both of us showing up to the recital semi-hung over? Rhythm Nation (not as good as 'Beat It') will always hold some good memories for me.

We're both semi-adventurers. We'll never go camping but we'll drive out of our way to check out new boutiques (that's an adventure!). How else would we have discovered one of our favorite stores, Diva? Our latest travel adventure to London was so much fun - lugging our suitcases into taxi cabs, through handicap-unfriendly train stations and going about our shenanigans in a whole new environment. There aren't many people that can go from an art museum to the outdoor markets and then back for a couture exhibit, all while constantly wondering if we bought enough wooden tulips to bring back home - but we did - and it was grand! This is where I deemed Amanda an agreeable traveling companion - and I can't wait to go on another adventure ('Sound of Music' anyone)?

Amanda seems to be the only one that I could really feel relaxed around and not have to worry about word vomit. If I had a thought on my mind, I knew I could spill it and she wouldn't ridicule me for thinking what I was saying. No political crossfires here.... No sir. I wanted to discuss the dilemmas of being a lesbian (if both lesbians are girly girls, then who gets the engagement ring?) or talk about my feelings for my top 5 famous boyfriends - and through it all, Amanda still took me seriously.

She's to the point and she sticks up for her friends. Amanda is extremely loyal and always up for anything (except camping - which I'm with her on that one). Her lawyer-side taught me that I need to be more aggressive when I've been wronged (this is SOOOOOOOO not HAM in my egg mcmuffin - it's sausage!). I just hope I can do her proud on my own.

What it comes down to is this - and I've told her this before - it's really hard to find someone with such similar interests but yet can have a differing opinion and really make you think about your own....and it's rare to find two such well rounded, accomplished people living in the same place. We always thought that somehow, in some way, we must've been separated at birth - despite our two-year age gap...and the fact that, oh yeah, I'm Chinese and she's not. But it never made a difference to us - we were like one in the same.

But what I like most about Amanda? Her laugh is just as loud as mine - and it's hearty.

I'll miss you Amanda!

Pulling Out the Race Card

Anyone that knows me knows that I'm pretty easy going when it comes to race. I am of Chinese descent but I make fun of my own people, other Asian people and heck, just about everyone else. I like to think that I am an equal-opportunity offender. I have some friends that joke about Chinese people or Asian people (lumping the races as a whole) and I laugh with them. And I have other friends that try to make comments in a delicate way but can't help but possibly offend - which I'm usually not offended by. I think a lot has to do with the fact that I don't really relate to Chinese people - I was born in New Jersey - I am an American. However, if I am personally threatened by something or someone due to my race, then I will speak up and defend myself - but that has rarely happened.

I can't think of one incident where I needed to pull out my race card. For those of you that may not be familiar with the race card, it can work two ways - as an offensive maneuver, pulling out the race card usually means that you're giving yourself an advantage (most times unfair) in order to make the outcome more beneficial to you; as a defensive maneuver, a person can pull out a race card if they have been accused of something unsavory (this will hopefully get you out of any trouble that you're in).

Most recently, Naomi Campbell was all over the news due to her unruly behavior in London's Heathrow -Terminal 5. Not only was there a disturbance on her flight, she supposedly became irate when one of her bags came up missing. Hello? Has she not been reading the news and all the baggage troubles that have been going on with Terminal 5?
Sidebar: My Dad actually just went through Terminal 5 on his way to Greece and he said the design is so flawed - it's more like a mall than a terminal. I'm thinking, 'Why mess with a good thing? Duty Free World in the United terminal was good enough for me!'
Okay - so she's a model - she's not supposed to read and know current events. But when she became unruly on her flight and she found out that her baggage was lost, the biatch went ballistic! She yelled, spat, maybe even flipped the bird - and eventually, she was hauled off to jail. (good call!) But then in her defense, she said that authorities singled her out because of her race. Sorry, Naomi - I think you've used that line before. AND your history of tirades and violence kind of makes us side with "good."

The race card is not something to be taken or used lightly. If you keep pulling it out, then you're eventually going to be like the boy who cried wolf. In this case, because I want to say that she has used the race card in the past, she is no better than that boy. I don't doubt that she has faced racial discourse in the past, but when she is the one that is doing the disrupting, yelling, spitting and serving up racial slurs, then I think it's time to pack it in, go with the police (with your tail between your legs) and shut the hell up!

And while we're talking about Naomi anyway, what the heck is up with her Gatorade (G2) commercial? Who was the genius that thought having her dance 'Thriller' with lizards/geckos would be cool? I certainly don't think it's cool - she wasn't even in that Michael Jackson video - she was in another one with him - so I don't get it. If the marketing people wanted to go with a model, there are a TON of other non-violent models out there that would've given off the same effect (WTF) or they could've paid those Filipino prisoners to do their 'Thriller' dance in the jail yard and had them cap it off with a nice refreshing G2.

I Recommend

I was just talking to my friend Calaneet the other day about the movie "Catch and Release." I've mentioned this one before, in my post "Fashion in Film." http://morningcupcake.blogspot.com/search?q=%22fashion+in+film%22 We agreed that it was a surprisingly good movie. Nothing earth shattering. It's not "Schindler's List" or "Dances With Wolves" or "The Shawshank Redemption." But I was expecting very little from it - just some mild fluff to serve as the background for my popcorn gorging. And it really kind of touched me.

I won't pretend that Timothy Olyphant had nothing to do with it (see http://morningcupcake.blogspot.com/search?q=olyphant), but it was more than that. It was the scenery (beautiful), the story (simple but effective), and the dialogue (half-way decent). It was the chemistry between Jennifer Garner and her leading men. It was Kevin Smith in a speaking role (although I still missed Silent Bob).

But something else came out of it - the soundtrack. Even in movies I don't particularly care for, there is usually some scene that resonates purely based on the music. While I liked "Catch and Release" on its own, the music in one scene really struck me. I thought to myself, "I must hunt this down."

Lo and behold - Joshua Radin.

The song was "What If You," which has become #1 in my Top 25 Most Played List. I liked it so much that I bought the "Catch and Release" Soundtrack (no more Joshua Radin there - but some other goodies). That led to a download of the entire album "We Were Here" and also the four track package "Unclear Sky." I also discovered that Joshua is a friend of Zach Braff, which was kind of an "a-ha" moment for me. Whatever Zach Braff packages as far as music, I seem to like (cases in point: the "Garden State" and "Scrubs" soundtracks). Joshua Radin can be found not once but TWICE on "The Last Kiss" soundtrack (which stands on its own as one of the best soundtracks I've heard in a long time).

Check him out. http://www.joshuaradin.com/

Not Fixin' to Say Fixin'

After a nearly seven year stint in our nation's capital, I'm headed back to the Lone Star State next week. My husband and I ate lunch yesterday at the Lone Star Steakhouse to kick things off. He commented on the moose head on the wall, by the kitchen. He asked, "Do they have moose in Texas?" I responded, "Uh - I don't think so. Yeah, that's weird." So perhaps a chain restaurant like Lone Star isn't the way to get into the Texas state of mind.

There's another way to get into the Texas state of mind, though, and that's the jargon. I'm gradually adding "y'all" back into my vocabulary. I kind of like "y'all." Sure, "you" can be plural, but it can lead to some confusion. People don't know whether they're being singled out or lumped into a group when you use "you." And that's where "y'all" fits in nicely. The only thing is - real Texans also use "y'all" to refer to just one person. So you eliminated the confusion by coming up with "y'all" and then you reinserted the confusion by using "y'all" to refer to just me? I guess that's how it works, y'all. Welcome to Texas.

"Fixin,'" however, I refuse to say. Nope. I just won't do it. While I am much more partial to a good Northeastern accent, I am willing to admit that a Southern drawl can be charming at times. But there's a difference between charming and hick, and to me, "fixin'" easily crosses that line. I may be "fixing" my car or "fixing" my hair, but I will never be "fixin" to buy a new t.v. or "fixin'" to find a new job. I won't even be "fixin'" to grab a can of Lone Star beer with salt sprinkled on the rim.

So I guess in Texas, I'll always be a Yankee.

I Need a Vacation!

I know I just got back from a nice, long weekend in Phoenix - well, it was a month ago but you would think that flying cross country and doing nothing much would satisfy my nerves until the warmer climate started rolling into the DC area and everything becomes more pleasant. Not so.

Our flight from Phoenix landed at Reagan National at about 7pm. Walking towards the baggage claim, I turn on my phone and check for messages...at 7:30pm, I found out that Purdue was assigned to the West bracket for March Madness, which means that their first two games were going to be played in DC. And who is the DC contact that will help Purdue stake out their "home base" while in DC? This gal! Well - all the stress knots that the masseuse worked out of my body suddenly reappeared!

So the week leading up to the first round games was crazy. I was hostile and irritable (especially to my coworkers) - but not without merit. When I got to work that week, I found out that my coworkers seemed to have take a vacation while I was on my vacation. No meeting minutes, no follow ups while I was gone, which equals no progress. Basically they couldn't tell me anything that I missed. That is unacceptable to me and they had to endure my wrath for the rest of the week. That's now how you want to start your week off after a pleasant vacation!

Ever since we got back from Phoenix, it's been non-stop for me - between work (covering for three people that were out at the same time, including my manager), volleyball, Purdue events, and going away parties, I haven't had a free moment to myself and therefore, I think I need another vacation. I mean, I haven't even been able to go shopping!

I look ahead at my calendar wondering when a weekend will come up when I have nothing to do. Sadly, I think that weekend will be April 19th. I know I have to slow things down and that weekend of the 19th is only one break that I will have until the activities start piling up again....volunteering, visiting my hair dresser (in dire need of a haircut) and parents (whom I haven't seen since Christmas - but you can see who is more important in this scenario because he got listed first) in NY/NJ, and weekend sports.

So what am I going to do that weekend of April 19th? Probably play a game of soccer and sleep...that's probably what I need most - sleep, and a nice massage...we'll see. It's two weeks away - in the meantime, I can have my younger nephew massage my feet when he's here over the weekend - he's only four but he loves feet!