The Best Of Sex

With the Sex and the City movie still fresh in my mind, I have been thinking back lately to the six seasons of the show on HBO. This was a great show for single women, and I have to say that it helped me through a lot of tough times, whether serious or shallow. I have Sex and the City to thank for my purchase of "He's Just Not That Into You," a book that, while largely tongue-and-cheek, could be the most liberating piece of self help I have ever read. This is where the mantra was born: "Don't Waste the Pretty" (i.e., don't waste one moment of your fabulous self on some guy who doesn't appreciate you). Here's a quick look at some of the best, most touching episodes.

1. Unoriginal Sin. This episode was a bright spot in an otherwise pretty much crap Fifth Season of the show (the one that was cut short because both Cynthia Nixon and SJP were pregnant - at least SJP was, which was obvious by the flowy, unflattering dresses they put her in (although nothing could explain the horrendous haircut)). This is the episode where Brady is baptized and Carrie is trying to decide what kind of message her book will have - whether it will be optimistic or pessimistic. Carrie also attends a daily affirmation seminar with Charlotte, who is discouraged about the way her marriage ended. In the end, after Charlotte suggests that "maybe it will work out" between Samantha and the cheating Richard, Carrie dedicates her book "To single women everywhere, and one in particular: My good friend Charlotte - who always believes in love." Whenever this episode comes on, I have to watch to the end because it is so sweet and makes me want to be a little more like Charlotte.

2. A Woman's Right To Shoes. How can any single woman not love this one about someone stealing Carrie's Manolos at a baby shower and the mother-to-be (a great cameo by Tatum O'Neal) criticizing "her choice" to buy such ridiculously expensive shoes? Even though the average age of brides has increased significantly over the last twenty years or so, I think there is still some pressure or expectation to want to get married and to want to have kids. But even if we don't do those things, our lives still matter. This episode really touched me because it made me think of all of the late nights at work at my old job and people talking about getting home to their spouses and kids while I, it appeared to be assumed, could work as late as needed because I only had a cat waiting for me at home. As women in the twenty-first century, we are lucky to be able to make many choices in life, and sometimes the non-traditional ones deserve to be celebrated too. I LOVED this episode.

3. Don't Ask, Don't Tell. This episode can be heartbreakingly hard to watch, but I think it just may be my absolute favorite. This is the one where Charlotte gets married to Trey and Carrie confesses the "Big Affair" to Aidan. There are so many parts that are sad, most notably Carrie pleading to Aidan, "maybe I can just be flawed" like the wood in the beautiful love seat he made as a wedding gift for Charlotte, and later Aidan coming to the church yard and telling her that he loves her but that it just isn't the kind of thing he can get over. But there are two gems in this episode that are unforgettable. The first is when Charlotte expresses some reservations to Carrie just before she walks down the aisle, and Carrie reassures her, "You don't have to do this. We can just catch a cab and get out of here, and everyone will just have to get over it." (her delivery of this line is perfect, and I can't do it justice in writing). And the second, the best, is at the very end, when she and the girls are taking pictures on the steps of the church and Carrie voices over, "It's hard to find people who love you no matter what. Lucky for me, I had three of them." I get a tear in my eye every time, and it is worth it EVERY TIME.

The episode where Carrie and Aidan break up a second time, however, I can't watch at all.

4. A Hop, Skip, and a Week. I very well could be the only person I know who liked Carrie with Jack Berger. Perhaps it is my obsession with Ron Livingston in Office Space - I'm not sure. But I was so happy to see him on Sex and the City. This episode, where Carrie and Berger take a "break" because he can't seem to get past his inferiority complex around her is another one of those sad ones. But at the same time, there is something strangely familiar about it. While Berger was certainly flawed, he was so in a very human way, and I felt bad for the guy. Sure, he shouldn't have dumped her on a post-it note, but he was a coward, especially because he knew he was wrong in his envy. The reason I love this episode, which is probably obvious to those who have seen it, is the reunion with Charlotte and Harry, when he asks her to marry him at the Jewish singles mixer. Her speech, "I don't care if you ever marry me. I just want to be with you" is her shining moment of the entire series. But I also love the end - Carrie knocking over the vase of carnations after receiving the post-it break up note - to the soundtrack of nothing but the water dripping from the vase onto the floor.

5. My Mother Board, My Self. This is yet another tearjerker, but it's such a goodie. While Carrie is a real jerk when she doesn't accept Aidan's help when her computer crashes, there are so many things to like about this episode. I love the scene with Miranda in the dressing room when the saleswoman is trying to help her pick out undergarments for the black dress she had to buy last minute for her mother's funeral - how Miranda resists the woman's efforts to help and finally breaks down and cries into her arms. I love when Carrie, seeing Miranda trying so hard to keep it together down the aisle after the service, jumps out of the Church pew and walks with her. And I love her voice over at the end when they spot Steve and Aidan at the back of the Church, "There's the kind of support you ask for, and the kind of support you don't ask for. And then there's the kind that just shows up . . ."