Phantom Baby

The struggles of being a new parent hits just about everyone. I don't know one person that says it wasn't hard at first and if there are people out there that says it's not, they're lying! (Just kidding)

The exhaustion, alone, is enough to do anyone in. For the first time since we've been together, I have never seen my husband so exhausted - how exhausted was he? He was so exhausted that in our first two days back from the hospital, he was sent into a fit of laughter. He couldn't stop laughing trying to get some shut eye. He said he it was all he could muster up - laughing. Hey, at least he wasn't crying.

The worst part of the exhaustion has to be when you're sleeping and you think you're holding a baby but you're not...I call this the 'Phantom Baby.' I don't know if it has happened to others but it happened to both me and my husband. We were both sleeping one night, last week, and I was getting ready to wake up for an overnight feeding. I was so careful getting out of bed, I think the whole time I had my arms in a 'cradle' position cause I thought I was holding a baby! When I got up and started walking around the bedroom, I WOKE UP and was like 'Holy cow, where's the baby?' Only to realize that the babies were safely in their cribs, in their rooms. I only thought I was holding a baby because I had been holding them so much lately and I guess it was so new to me.

Later, that same night, after getting back from an overnight feeding, my husband turned over in the bed when I settled myself back in and asked if the feedings went okay. I told him they did and not two minutes later did he kind of shoot up in bed and start patting himself on the chest saying, 'Where's the baby? Where did he go?' He thought he had been holding the baby against his chest and lost him. I told him, 'The babies are in their crib!' He sorta woke up and said, 'Okay, I believe you' and went back to sleep.

I was awoken ten minutes later to my husband lifting the sheets above me and looking underneath (in the dark) for something. I turned to him and said, 'What are you doing?' He replied, sleepily, 'Is the baby with you?' I said, 'No, he's in his crib.' Another 'phantom baby' moment.

So don't be surprised to feel like you've been holding a baby when you haven't...it happens. I don't know how often it happens to others but it happened to us on the same night.