We are all guilty of spacing out during face to face conversations - some more often than others, but I'm sure everyone has experienced it at some point in their lives, whether they are the spacer or the spacee. I'm one of those 'more often than others' spacers...reference 'Living with (self-diagnosed) Adult ADD': http://morningcupcake.blogspot.com/2007/10/living-with-add.html.
It's not just face-to-face conversations with me, though. It happens on the phone too - I end up multi-tasking or worse: watching TV while on the phone with someone - that's really bad - and all you get out of me is 'uh huh' or 'yeah.' In hindsight, I feel bad for those that have had to deal with me on the phone during one of these "episodes." I can imagine the people on the other side wondering if they're talking to a brick wall. Short answer: yes.
But email is a whole different story. Email is something that you do on your own time and schedule. You write an email when you want to get in touch with someone. You respond to an email when you want to keep the conversation going. But to totally ignore an email without a response or even a 'hey, I got it - I'll respond back later'? That's unacceptable to me. Cause then I'm left wondering - did they ever get the email? Did I do something to make them mad? Do I smell? Really - all these things run through my mind when I don't hear back from people - and then I go from wonderment to anger.
The anger stems from a lack of response within a "courteous" amount of time. If I have an email out there (especially one that is awaiting a response), I give people about 48 hours to respond back to me. 90% of my acquaintances are in front of a computer at some point of the day - so I think 48 hours is fairly reasonable. Of course there are certain situations where I know I won't get that response - vacation and illness are pretty much the only two I'll allow longer wait period- and of course death, because who can stop death? But really - I'm only asking for a little common courtesy. A 'hey - let me think about that' or 'hey - I got your message - let's talk next week.' Is that too much to ask? Are my email response standards too high?
I sent out this email a few days ago asking a budget question for an event to be held in nine weeks. The event is a small-ish reception - about 50-70 people. But still - a locale needs to be secured, food needs to be ordered, information needs to go out, marketing needs to take place - it's like a mini-banquet in nine weeks. I sent out a couple of emails to people that say they want to be involved but somehow don't respond to anything you send them. Great. So then I'm left to my own devices to figure out where and when to have this little event. I've pretty much homed in on a venue and prices - but another one of my emails about budgets went unanswered until today - it was sent out about four days ago. (I'll let it slide because it's still the holidays and I'm not a total bah-humbug.) I've already responded with the information I've gathered (oh look - less than an hour) and will now give it 'til Monday before I probably start pulling my hair out.
I shouldn't have to feel like I'm "talking to a brick wall" via email.
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